You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
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He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
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He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
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