I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
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remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
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