You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
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