i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
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He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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