When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize