It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize