are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I love how my cats smell like pot.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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