nut hugger
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
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