My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Randomize