if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Randomize