i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
Fuck appropriateness.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Drunk is not a location!
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Randomize