I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize