dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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