my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
is that a dick in a sweater?
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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