Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
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