...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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