this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize