I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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