wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize