i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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