I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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