My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Randomize