I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize