i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
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My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
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How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
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