don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I party with great urgency now.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize