I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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