I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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