You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
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