You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
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mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
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