You work out of a Hotel?
Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
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