At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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