remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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