drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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