It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize