there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
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