2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no. you can't hotbox the world.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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