If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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