If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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