You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
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