Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Randomize