At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Houston, we have a blender
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
My vagina just clenched in fear
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