I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
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