Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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