that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Randomize