Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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