this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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