why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize