you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Randomize