I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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