when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize